Christa Lista

Yes, I am going to make a list...why not?  It is just about the end of 2011 and I've got a new year ahead of me.  I've got a pretty good feeling that 2012 is going to be a very decent year for me.

I've given up the 2nd job.  While all that extra dough is nice to have (and spend), it leaves absolutely no time for me to be able to enjoy this thing called life.  I now understand the proverb "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy".  While not entirely suited for my situation, I get it, I definitely get it.

I was sick.A.Lot.this past year.and I have no doubt that the whole no down-time thing played a very big role in me being sick.  That's not the life I want to live.  The down-time I did have was spent on the couch, stuffing my face with garbage because my body wanted nutrients and I thought I heard it say "Chocolate" and "Grilled Cheese sandwich".  I finally was able to translate what it really wanted when I stepped on the scale and realized I had gained back all of what I had lost.

One day this past November, I finally heard it loud and clear "Vitamins".  Ooooooh....okay.

Anyway, I've learned to appreciate my down-time.  I will no longer use it to do right by my pocket.  I will use it to do right by my body, my mind and my soul.  aka Balance

1. Make a bedtime and stick to it as best as you can (10:30pm)
2. Journal as often as possible (I've found that I enjoy getting inside my head and thinking out loud, even if it only makes sense to me)
3. Turn off the T.V. - it sucks me in every.single.time. and before I know it, I've wasted 4 hours on nonsense
4. Create - get the juices flowing and actually make things, finish projects I've started or intended to start but never got around to it.
5. Clean and keep clean.  Working 7 days a week doesn't offer much time to keep clean and organized, now with all of this new found time, I have no excuse really
6. Get on the lake - I've already started pricing out Inflatable water crafts and it looks like an inflatable Kayak may be just the right thing for me/us.  It will be great exercise too!
7. Get on the road - take day trips to places I haven't been such as Tallulah Falls, a gorgeous spot that I've been wanting to see since I found out I would be moving to GA back in 2004, it's time I get there.
8. Use the earth as my gym.  No one ever said you had to go to a fitness facility to get in a great workout.  I would love a bicycle
9. Give back - I would love to volunteer some of this new found time on a farm, getting sweaty and dirty.  Another great way to workout AND get some fresh veggies!
10. Meditate - woooooosaaaaaaaaahhhh  it feels good

I think I'll end it here for now.  I guess those are my top 10 things I'd like to get going on in the coming new year.  Looking forward to living a life of more purpose for my health instead of just work, I tried that, it's not all that great for me.

12-6-11 It's a New Day!

I didn't get to the gym last night BUT I did do a P90X workout with BF before dinner!  It wasn't too bad, I went at my own pace and didn't try to over do it.  I know that once my body is more active, I'll be able to handle more.  I did push myself a few times, I wasn't a total slacker.  At one point during the decline push ups, my arms completely gave up!  I found my entire upper body smashed on the floor!  It wasn't pretty, I am sure!  Not sure if it was the workout or what, but I woke up before 6am....and, you know I think I got a full 8 hrs of sleep last night!  That's something I've been striving for and I am always happy when I can get that.

Today's Green Smoothie:
Spinach (Fresh)
Cucumber (Fresh)
Cilantro (Fresh)
Ginger (Fresh)
Blueberries (Frozen)
Mango (Frozen)
Green Cabbage(Fresh)
Apple (fresh)
Zico Coconut Water

Today's Goals:
Avoid sugar
Take all supplements
Eat all meals using the Somersize guidelines (You know this really does work, right?)
Move that body


Tonight I'm headed over to Allison's to make some handmade Christmas Cards.  I've always loved this tradition, we didn't do it last year, so I am glad we're going to pick it up again this year.  I probably won't get in a workout, which kinda stinks, but perhaps I can find a way to work something in there somewhere....maybe at lunchtime or something, even if it's a walk around the parking lot.


Breakfast 8:00 AM
3 Adrenal
1 Garlic
1 Total Leaky Gut
1 L-Theanine
1 Vitamin C
Green Smoothie


Snack 10:00 AM
2 Hard Boiled Eggs
Coffee, 1/2 & 1/2, 2 pkts Splenda

Lunch 1:00 PM

2 Adrenal
1 Total Leaky Gut
1 Vitamin C
Grilled Chicken w/ Provolone
Coffee, 1/2 & 1/2, 4 pkts Splenda

Dinner


Workout

Facing My Fear

Last we spoke about my weightloss, I was telling you about how I reached ONEderland and stuff about goals and milestones etc. I also mentioned near the end of the post that I was scared....so I guess that's what I want to talk about, because it will help me get through.
But before I get into it, check out this picture of me from the weekend....down 20 something pounds....I can't really see it here...I really want to, but I don't.  That doesn't mean I look at this picture in disgust, it just means that I can't see the weightloss.  Though I did notice my forearms are looking slimmer ;)

What am I afraid of you ask? Simple....not going any further in my journey, and reason being because this is always where I get to. Right here, right where I am. This is the weight/size where people start noticing, I get comfortable and then slowly creep my way back up to 220 lbs. I've done this on more than one occassion, can't give it a number but if I sat down to think about it, I'd probably need two hands to count.
But my fears are a little more at ease this week and it's because my At Work meetings are starting again on Thursday. It is REALLY convenient and motivating to have this program at the office in addition several of my work buds are rejoining as well...so we've got a nice support system there.
I do believe I've "got it" this time. This time around it doesn't stop with just wanting to be a smaller size, it's an all around "I want to be better to me" thing. I am demanding respect from people around me. I am not letting anyone walk all over me or bring drama to my life and if they do, I am ridding myself of them. This is a more empowered version of myself that I am dealing with. Nothing is stopping me. But I believe it would be easier to slip back into my old ways of eating if the next session of WW wasn't starting at work, I know this because we've been out for a few weeks already and I am finding that I am not as stict with my food choices. So, I guess I don't really "have it" yet....but I am getting there. I hope.
I am quite sure I've put on a few pounds in the past few weeks. We'll see what the scale has to say on Thursday. I'm not gonna let it get me down though. I've got a whole journey ahead of me and I am not always going to be perfect and I need to continue to accept that. I can't get mad at myself for slipping, just pick up again and move forward.
I went to the gym last night. I always feel great after a workout. Proud of myself for taking care of myself. I deserve it. :D
Hope all are enjoying warmer weather and sunshine!!! Have a great week!

It's a beautiful day

Remember how I am working on self improvement?? Well a more active lifestyle comes along with that for me....I've been too sedantary for too long. So I've been waking up each morning with the sound of my friends voice in my head, speaking softly to me saying "It's a beautiful day for a power walk in the neighborhood"...ya know what??? It works! I am able to immediately get up, put on my workout clothes, apply my crest whitening stips and hit the pavement! I've NEVER been able to do this before, no matter how hard I have wanted to. This is pretty big for me. I've also been making more of an attempt to enjoy all that my gym facility has to offer. I'm not going as often as I would like, but I am there several times a week including the weekends.
AND YA KNOW WHAT??? It's paying off.
I ordered my Bridesmaid dress for Gretchen's wedding back in January before I left for Norway. They measured me and showed me where I fell on the sizing chart. I asked to order 1 size down....the dress came in last week. I went to the Bridal Shop to try it on and pick it up. I asked a store associate to help me zip it up mentioning to them that it may not zip up because I ordered one size too small.....and I hear "ziiiiiiip!" all the way up....it fits!
Last night after a full day at work and an additional 4 hrs sewing at Job #2, I came home and was feeling really good. I was looking through my closet and saw the dress and so decided to try it on again. I was able to zip it up myself by turning the back of the dress to the front, zipping it and then turning it around......WOW!!!! Have I lost that much in 1 week???? I wasn't able to do that at the bridal shop....a dress that I ordered 1 size too small 2 months ago is actually too big!

Go me!

2nd Session, 1st Homework Assignment

I had my first counseling session 2 weeks ago. This was more of the "getting to know you" I basically gave Stacey (the counselor) the story of my life in a nutshell.... I wasn't expecting much feedback that day. What I did walk out of there from her with was a validation of my strength. People tell me all the time how strong I am, but it was nice to hear from a trained professional who is not paid to compliment me.

I had my second session today. We discussed many things, relationships, work, etc...but mainly focused on the fact that I have a talent/natural ability for fashion yet I am not working in that industry. She had me do an imagery exercise where she calms me to a relaxed state by closing my eyes and breathing, and noticing my breath, then relax each part of my body and then imagine myself where I want to be. My mind bounced all around to different things but there were 2 settings. What I imagined was seeing myself in a design room approving sketches for a line...I didn't see any sketches, but there was lots of paper and someone standing there showing me them. I had a sense of lots of energy and there was this bright aura surrounding me which made me feel powerful, successful and happy....lots of color all around the room and then I would bounce to the other setting of still water, a lake. There were lots of trees and flowers and a cabin nearby with a boat dock on the water. I didn't actually see myself like I did in the design room setting, it was more like I was present in the setting, seeing the scene from where I was sitting....does that make any sense?? It was very peaceful and natural. Something I noticed about "being where I want to be" was that there was no man involved. No one to hold me back I guess....
I don't know how all of this ties into the homework assignment she gave me, but I'm sure it does. Well actually the more I think about it, the more it makes total sense....sigh. She wants me to think about when guilt has inhibited me. You have no idea!!! Just about every man I have been in a serious relationship with has made me feel guilty about being me in some form or another....it's no wonder I didn't see one in my imagery of where I want to be.

I'm feeling positive about this. Like I said in my first post, I'm taking baby steps to self improvement. I've got a lot of shit to work out...thankfully nothing too traumatic, at least not traumatic in my book. And it's funny how I'm seeing how so many aspects of my life corrolate to one another though totally seperate from one another.....already, just in session two.

It's a new dawn, it's a new day, it's a new life...for me...and I'm feelin good!